My husband passed three months ago, and it still feels like yesterday. You are not alone, and it's okay to try and meet people to have a normal conversation that isn't about death and how you cope. I am still new to being a widow so my friends and family are still treading lightly around me. That is the reason I came here, to find people to talk to that can say something funny and constructive. It would be nice to talk to someone that is going through the same thing, but understands you are not looking for a replacement spouse.
Time heals nothng. You need to do your own inner work. I dated a widower..8years after his first wifes death. he would not stop talking about their life together. Even though we planned to be married and have "our" life. I hated being compared to her at every turn. Do the grief work first before trying to date again. Whatever you do, dont talk incessantly about the deceased if your trying to move forward. I'll never date another widower. Why define yourself that way?? its something that happened. its not who you are.
Guilt and worry are useless emotions. Guilt leaves you in the past, worry puts you in the future. Both keep you from living in the present.
I am newly widowed (4 months ago) and am hoping like crazy that I will feel like a normal person again. I know it is way too early for me to expect it. But I am hopeful.
I am just popping in to say that it takes as long as it takes, cant use a calendar, or any thing else. It'll be different for everyone, with each unique situation. Just wanted to wish you the best, you deserve it.